Hi y'all! I'm officially back to being a blogger again! =) It's been like 4-5 yrs since I last blog. And obviously i'm not getting any older. I'm going to be 20 this year this coming march. Alot has been happening in my life lately.If i'm not wrong, the last I blog about was when I was in school. Hmm..still remember my good old days where I only care about saving money, finding a part-time job and exams. It's been a rocky years ever since my dad decide to change job.Oh well..What's past is past..What's left is just memories. To lay it down my 5 years of MIA in my blog, I've decided to type it all down here so that if one day, I forget anything or I just wanna remember the good times in my life or bad.. I just need to go my blog n read. Amazing isn't it? Technology has grown to be part of our life's and w/o it now, we definately can't survive..but not in a drastic way of course.In addition, my grandfather passed away in 2007. I really missed him.He's the only one that care about me and shower me with so much love. But, now he's gone, i just don't feel the love in my house anymore. What they care is for me to get a job and earn money. They don't even bother to asked me what I want to do in life or what I want.. They couldn't care less about my birthday. Every year my birthday has always been with my friends. Last time my grandfather used to bought me stuff. But now, its me n my friends. Heck, if I want anything, I have to earn my own salary.Sometimes, I wonder why other parents are so much different then mine. They stop giving me pocket money ever since I had a job. I was only 16 people.After that, everything that I had comes from my own pocket. My mum don't even care about me. She just want me to graduate from school and werk and give her money. I see other parents is different. Parents go out to werk. They make the sacrifices to do so much for their children but they don't appreaciate them. Their parents work so hard to give them education, their needs, food, water, shelther and most important of all being a teenager and not let them grow up too fast. Me on the other hand, I can't remember when was the last time I had so much fun as a teenager or when i was given pocket money,a toys, a pen, sweets, compliment or a goodnight kiss..My life just seem sao sad and lonely. Nobody knows my pain and what I've been thru. I just keep it bottle up to myself. Hoping one day it will go away...Sometimes the pain become unbeareable it's like something just pierced thru my heart. Infact, my family nv seen me cry b4 or a drop of tears..They think i'm strong and can face any challenges. But what they don't know is that i'm very fragile and delicate. And anytime I could have a breakdown. To know more about my reality.. stay on and read on..
Here's a recount on what was going on with my life after 2007..
2008
Finaly received my 'O' Level result. It wasn't that bad but just as I expected. I failed my maths and science badly. No poly, No ITE..I've got nothing but gustang. But, I have one option though, I could apply nitec to futher my studies, and from there to higher nitec, than diploma to degree.. But life dosen't always goes the way you wanted. My dad needed me to work full time as he can't managed the bills alone. Further more, he wasn't been able to support me to further my studies. I was feeling quite upset n hurt. I mean I loved more than anything to go to school everyday and just being a student not adulthood. Responsibility is the only word that I'm preety familiar of since I was born and hated it practically my entire life! Being the eldest, becoming a role model, a leader and the lists goes on. Some people even say that i'm too matured for my old age. Hey, i'm not the one who ask myself to grow up so fast. Heck! I don't even know how to be a teenager. But, as some people say.. life goes on. So, I went to look out for jobs. But, I wasn't the one who looked for it. My dad picked out a couple of jobs and ask me to go for an interview. I have try applying for a flightstewardess (silkair/ SIA) at mandarin hotel, some clerks in a hospital, nurse asst, kindergarden teacher at ubi, to a more manly jobs like police even though I didnt meet the requirement but got in 4 interview, ICA and finally SAF. It's a long lists. I know! Tell me about it. But, not once I complaint to my dad that some of the job I really don't want to go for it. But, with perseverance, I applied and waited. I've waited for quite some times. And during the times that I waited for a job offering, I went to look for a 2nd job at downtowneast. Who am I kidding?! I can't survive with a minimal wage of $3.42 per hour. And I have to werk like crazy esp durind peak hours and still take back home less than $300 every month. In Singapore, you can't survive with that. Even the cleaner earns alot more than me. So, i've decided to apply at Cathay. I like cinemas and the smell of popcorn. So yeah, I apply and get the job kinda straight away. It was a nice feelin.. Different environment, pay a little bit higher but all good.$4.50 per hour is still beats $3.42 per hr. But, after a while, I feel that there there's a lot of political issues going on. Chinese are the majority there. So, I feel abit leftout. Its just not the race, since the boss is chinese, they like conquer the area even at night. I don't really like the feeling though. But, I like what I'm doing, simple, easy, not heavy duty and all. But, I still hate cleaning the popcorn pot.Its huge n I hate scripping the sugar off it. It's so stubborn! But other than that, it's all good..minus the credit card which is like I got one time did something that I almost have to pay 100 bucks out of my own pocket. Luckily,the customer was kind enough to come back.. I thought at that moment I was about to get yelled at from the customer..Lucky he didn't. Thank god he did not..pheww! But, I quitted Cathay soon after(6 mths), as macd offer me a position as a manager. I took it at 1st. But it wasn't worth it. You gotta plan schedule, come as schedule, go for class and so on b4 becumin a trainee mgr. But, life at macd I had enuf of it. Plus, I asked ard the pay of werking midnight shift. Its the same as fo trainee mgr. So, I rather go for it in case I've got an interview or anything the next day, I still will be able to make it w/o complicating my schedule. It was fun at night, one thing less crowds,except during the hols.. And it just so happen one day, I came to werk, there's 3 China gals came to werk and it's their first day. My manager is a phillipines which is like impossible to communicate in chinese, kitchen got 2 indians malaysian and 1 chinese malysian crew, and counter plus lobby got me! Imagine the chaos that happen there. The chinese guy took one of them cox needed one more crew to do kitchen and the other 2 attached to me. I was like how to communicate with them?? Okay lucky for me at that time I watched too many chinese shows. So I talk to them the way I noe best. But, it was a total nightmare for me. Crowds in at midnight till 1am. And worst I havent teach them how to clear rubbish, fry the fries, take drinks and ice,pack the fries, serve the customer and so on. I was at my losing end. Customer just seem to be impatient with me even though i was the onli one werking and noe how to do stuff.It was crazy. My manager was nowhere to be found at that time. So, asked 1 of the kitchen guys to take care of the fries, while at the same time teach the gals to take products and drinks. It's the only things that I could teach them at the shortest time. After the crowd clear, I quickly took the opportunity to teach them in Chinese some more and let one of them do the lobby which includes, cleaning, moppin, sweepin,n clearing trays. Thats done. But the worst still yet to come. I was supposed to do a change over b4 4am. But, since i was busy, I changed a little bit too late. Luckily, the chinese guy offer help with the cleaning of utensils. Hey, its already bad as it is to monitor the two gals, taking order,cleaning n changing menu,fry hashbrown and do secondary duties at the same time. By the time the clock strike 7am, I asked the manager to let me off earlier to rest. It was a very busy and complicated day that day. Moving on, after a few months of waiting, I've finally got a kindergarden job. I like kids plus I have never go into teaching in my career b4. So I was psyched when I heard I've got a job there. But, at the same time on that day, i also have a very important decision to make, I was offer 4 jobs! Teacher, ICA,SPF and SAF! But, in the end I took SAF as they offer me a higher pay. And trust me when I signed for SAF, I didn't know what to expect..esp outfield. I didn't even know what is outfield like.. So i signed contract with them for 10 yrs and my journey begins as a soldier when I when to BMT in Tekong. 8 girls in total. 3 Army 5 Navy...one platoon from Pegasus.
2009
After my BMT, i went for my Supply supervisor course for 4 months. Come out as a PTE..and a few months later..3SG!! I was happy to get 3SG..but when you are a 3SG all the sai kang comes to you. everything you have to do and handle. Basically, my life in 2009 was quite a boredom. Nothing much to tell either. Its a routine werk in which if i tell you, you'll probably dozed off..But here goes...
Every morning, wake up at 4.20am, bath, dress up, took a bus that came at 5.15am..reach MRT at 5.30am..find a seat and sleep all the way to boon lay or if i missed joo koon. drop off at boon lay, wait for shuttle bus that came at 6.45am of 6.55am. Reach camp at 7.15am..if drop at joo koon reach camp at 7.20am.. for monday, weds n friday need to be at parade square at 7.30am. For tues and thurs..8am fall in.. so on mon,weds n fri..7.30am reach parade sq, take attendance then go for run. Then proceed on with my werk till 5pm i will madly rush out of the gate and walk all the way to joo koon mrt, sit and sleep back allt he way to Pasir Ris. Reach Pasir Ris at 6.30pm..took a bus back n finally reach home dead tired at 7pm or latest 8pm depends on what time i took the train. Pack my bags with a new set of uniform, eat dinner, put my washed clothes in my cupboard, facebooking for awhile, bath, watch some tv then finally sleep at 12am earliest. Latest at 2.30am..and the routines follow exactly the same. Call me dull, boring no life person but its a fact my life simply ends when i hold this job tht far..And my weekends usually spent on learning driving, hang out at the mall wif my friends but most of the time I shop alone..Come back home watch tv whole day..I hardly go out due to one reason.. I ardy spent so much on transportation to and fro to work. And my pay every month i spent on bills n groceries n my mum.. what i have left is only abt enuf to g drivin n $200 or less to spent for the entire month.. And I still think I like it beta when my work place was near my house and i only have to invest on a bike. which i could really need the money that i used to spent on transport alone for other things. So that was in 2009..
2010
I have a lot of things to do this year.
1st stop my TP is in march 19th..I hope I passed one time go so that i dun have to spent alot more money on driving..And if i passed it will be like my greatest b'dae present ever!!
2ndly, i'm applying for higher nitec in Logistic..Given a choice i would rather take other skills beside logistic..Say nursing for example or if possible i rather take up law or psychology..the 3 courses i like to take up. But, I can't. If i don't take logistic, my career progression will be slow..
3rdly to plan my b'dae party!! I'm gonna be 20 this 17th march=) i'm so getting old..haha..
4th i have to passed entrance test which is like o level standards maths n eng..I have no prob with eng but maths seems like pulling me down.. But i managed to passed even though i spent less than 15 mins on my maths lol..but.yeah, i'm preety happy about it..
5th..i have a new mission.. that is i have to lose weight which i have gained while werking in macd n at the same time change the way i dress outside but not to werk..hehe..more lady like..
I just hope 2010 will be a better year for me even though 2009 wasn't the year i expect to be happy..Anyways, I'm not a lucky gal at all.. So i was hoping i'll be lucky this year..(crossfinger n praying hard it will happen=s

my first day come back to work was quite fun n happy...talk to the auntie's n chat wif my colleagues..but then there's this one gal frm my sch...her attitude reali sux..not onli tat she complain abt me n my sis!!!in front of me somemore! i was so fed up n angry...i didnt noe the everybody hated them..but once i sarted complaining to the rest...they fees up n say ya she sux..we started fighting...some complaint to my manager..whoa cannot tahan her..you noe the funny thing is tat once she come everybody punch out...tat include me..

whoa...now finish school feel so bored at home...nothing to do...i haven't start work yet though...i'm still enjoying life wif my peeps...hahas..after gradz i will be starring work soon..i'm so gona miss sch...went back to sch a few days back, to take sci n humans paper...saw mr yap n chat a wile lah...mr yap says now is a gd time to gain work experience..which i find tat to be true..i'm startin mac htis coming tuesday..nervous lah considering tat i haven been to work 4 quite some tmye..pinjia if u wan ur sci paper msg me kae i pass to u...i've got alot..

Finaly, 2 more paper n can say bb to PRCS.. i so gona miss all my frends there.i think my o level result is rubbish this yr coz of my maths n sci paper..i cn't even go poly now.well, my decision if i fail my o's is tat i will probably start working full tyme n retake o level again...or i get a course in ite..whicheva way i choose i will still accept it..no regrets..jane on the other hand think tat i can make it n go poly...if she right then it will be a miracle lah.. okae gotta go n study ss now..

WTH! chemistry paper so difficult to do..all my results show no rxn n no ppt formed..worsed the experiment tat i did was all wrong 4 chem..haiz...no hope alrdy 4 me to pass my o levels lah.so if sci fail, i have to study doubly hard 4 maths, eng, history n combined humanities..hope i pass.JY todae almost cry during the practical coz all she got is white solution.Ahmad even beta..physics the drawing onli do one..comfrm liao he gona failed practical..SY even beta broke the test tube coz she felt nervous. me? well, i was having sore throat n flu. in additon i was having migraine n feel like im gona vomit..so not fair lah.. y must feel sick during my o levels...aarrrgghh!!11my practical die liao..i tink i can say bb to poly n hello to "ite'(it's the end).

a few more days to o level and im struggling like hell to study every topic including maths..next week is alrdy practical.i dun even noe whether i can pass..hope i can lah..sci n maths must go all out nw...hmm...wat else...ooohhh..b4 i forget to all my malay frends Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Fitri!

i can't wait 4 o level to be over... im like studying everyday like mad rushing thru as much facts as posible...wateva the outcome of my o level results i will faced it positively becoz i noe tat i have tried my best even though my maths still like shit..hahas.. every body noes tat..to all taking o level ...best of luck to u all n don't give up hope even if u think u can't make it...try ur best ...at least if u fail u won;t fail with regret..jia you!!

Nur Hamizah
PRCS
17MARCH`90
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